Saddam's anti-contrition can fairly borrow from French royalty. “Apres mois, le deluge…
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Pumps
Black pumps, white purse, beige boots, the exacting bulemia of a month of Rome purchases.
Spam the Man
Download! she commands. Now! she adds. Fill your Pharmacy! Hot Me is the Wang for You!
Middle Milan
If I want to see friends visiting Italy, I must follow them to Florence, Venice or Rome.
Rain Man
Albert Camus, my mother said, lost his way sometimes. Perhaps it was mere absent-mindedness.
Casablanca
A wife says: "I came the office but you were not there, so I took a walk, alone…"
Spaculation
"Sinically depressed" are the hardest to understand when you're not one.
Leopardi clean
With your Rome roommate, there's clean and then there's Leopardi clean.
Comedy Central
Offer pork chops to a whirlwind and you get… a whirlwind.
Tidbit intelligence
If you're going to speaking intelligently about Italy, you might as well know what you're laughing about.
Don’t Ask
"You have a complex fistula. We have to operate. You will be able to live a normal life." Time to call the parents.
Pet travel blues
Columnist Erica Firpo says that taking your pet on a trip depends on its passport. Getting one is the hard part.